"When the going gets tough, tough gets the going"
And then they say, That's the way it is.
Seriously, when in doubt flowing with the flow is apparently the toughest task. Nonetheless its also the best way out. Doubt is a state of self-deception, where sense of right-wrong blurs and we experience dichotomy of split self. That is the Life of a Woman. Anyhow, the day we are born, we experience pangs of eternal confusion.
From a tiny toddler, to an aging wrinkled mind not even a second goes by without the thought , " That's the way it is??" Bound in the social milieu "Fairer Sex" goes through mental and physical evolution with grace and dignity because this is how it should be. Struggling through so many ifs and butts (Literally) , acceptance of Status-Quo becomes imperative. In tight situations one ought to sound socially viable, we behave not in our natural way, but altered reactions are given precedence.
I often wonder , in case reactions to situations were more real, would course of our lives been any different from what we are today? Would there be lesser burden of an entangled life?
How exciting it would have been to enjoy your Ice lolly with the same exalting sigh in front of zillions of people as you would do alone.
"Days of the month" ( This is a classic term for teenage guys to get cheap thrills) when reporting late to work, you can tell your superiors that " hey, did not feel like coming to work early" , knowing they would never hold it up against you and would not think like 15 year old guys. (Trust me, its both)
For all the Chocolate lovers ;) , while the first decadent piece goes into the mouth, can we not give the orgasmic reaction in a 5 Star restaurant as well. ( For Chiclets who do not like Chocs, I am sure there are many other indulging foods for you) . Because we love chocolates so much , let us enjoy it at peace.
Why are we to be our altered selves invariably always ?? Oops the Social Stigma.
The Indian Society has consciously bound Women into a mold of being " Mannequins of Desirability" . Carefree lives of innocent smiles are trampled around early teens. The best guy friends suddenly ought to become acquaintances. In case you are blessed with desirable physical traits in your teens, it has to be guarded. There is strict check on the company kept, the clothes worn and the social conduct. The evolution process being so taxing emotionally /physically for the EVES but that is the Law of nature. Decision on hobbies, interests and personality is decided by custodians of Budding Damsels who will forever be in Distress.
Outlook in Metros is more Liberal towards the Fairer Sex . (Ohh...Its a blessing every parent asks for, to have a Fair, BeautifuLL and DutifuLL Daughter). Our lives are Full of calculations right from the day realization of Feminity dawns on us. The reason being " Times are bad, you need to keep yourself safe from any harm". The harm happens usually from the same men who inhabit the society as best guy friends being kids. No fault of theirs, but instantly all love, friendship , passion & care becomes too unnerving once female company from being a constant becomes a luxury. As a 10-12 year old your next door friend Pinky , at 20 becomes Pinks ;) . Yes , the female charms work wonders on macho/cute Guys. Parents keep a tight watch, on age/weight/clothes while Our Young Princesses actually embark on their independent journey of life.
Of whatever aspirations we have, luckily education has been recognized and encouraged even in a Girl Child. Fairly fairing better with books, women are now being pushed out of the realms of Typecasts (only superficially) and given a chance to prove themselves. Ironically, once the Princesses start to relish their independence with obvious glitches, Its time for the Kings to take over their lives. For whatever I have decoded, this independence is a sham. The social stigmas are so complex that a woman in the end has to unknowingly succumb happily to the chains of domesticity. This for the first time looks like the Fairy tale to our damsels, Dream Prince/King awaiting in his Golden Chariot often carved out of the toils of her parents.
Yes , Its the start of a new phase of servitude (Lucky Woman= Served by Men/Man= Joru ka Ghulaam).
The new life starts with meeting social expectations, taxing parents with price of large scale weddings, appeasing future family and so forth. Eventually , Career will take a backseat in case family is a priority. If family is not a priority, this is not a balanced woman. A woman in order to prove her mettle , will balance perfectly between being a homemaker and a butter winner. Hardly can a woman be accepted and respected being a bread-earner. Her income would invariably be considered as icing on the cake. Going the family way, physical toils make it impossible to carry career aggressively. Women at work till settled are taken seriously but moreso casually. One in a thousand is lucky enough to be given a chance to be as successful as her potential.
Being tender hearted soul, she would eventually give up her career, passions and life for her family.
At the moment , holding her infant daughter in her hand she would think, " I would give her a better life than mine, with all opportunities life can offer. She will be a free bird & live to the fullest. " While a parallel thought would seep in, we have to start saving for her marriage, " God give her a nice and loving husband".
In a moment, the closed fist of the infant girl already has the destiny written , she will be the DamseLL in Distress.
PS- Its a pleasure to be around a sunny , chirpy and bubbly girl. Always keep her alive even at 70 years. I have the pleasure of having the best Parents who have given me ample opportunities but with discretion. At heart, all women know, That's the way it is. :)
Make the Best of Your Potential.
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